I’ve realised that I’ve been pretty lucky not to have grown up in a Christian culture in some ways. Why? Because I never learned all the politics of church and religious culture. All the add-ons, and as a result some religious rituals or rules make me giggles.

However, praying is not usually one of them.

I LOVE to pray. I love to pray for people. I totally have no qualms about the Holy Spirit (which freaks a lot of my Jesus believing friends out).

The fact is inviting the Holy Spirit to come and minister to people is a dangerous and sometime hilarious business. And you know what? That is biblical. As one church leader pointed out the first post-Jesus evangelistic sermon started with the words ‘We’re not drunk‘

People speaking weird languages. People being healed of injury or ailment. People falling over. People starting to laugh. People screaming as evil spirits are cast out of them.

It is weird. It is tough (if not impossible) to explain.

But surely, if it was explainable, it would not be God at work?

Anyway. With all the havoc that the Holy Spirit creates, praying can be a highly dangerous business. And I’d just like to give you a few examples of how, and a few pointers for those of you who like accident prevention. Especially as you gather with other Christians and may be involved in prayer ministry today (being that it’s Sunday and all).

1. Being prayed for may make you cry.

So before you go to a gathering of Christians where you may possibly be prayed for, do not wear eyeliner under your eyes. And if you want to wear mascara make sure it is of the waterproof sort.

2. Being prayed for may make you fall backwards.

I was very dubious about this whole falling backwards thing until of course it happened to me for the first time at Imagine 2008. The first time was all fine as I had 2 lovely women who had insisted on praying for me (I was trying to duck out under the premise that I was on the prayer ministry team). They caught me, didn’t hype anything and all was overwhelming but good.

So size up your pray-ers…are they going to be able to catch you if you fall?

3. Being prayed for may make you fall backwards, and when you fall backwards your top may ride up.

And you will have no control over the fact this happening. You may reveal more than you want to of your body, bordering on the edge of inappropriate. Or stomping right over the edge of inappropriate. And while it’s nice that God has given you a word and a picture of the woman in South Africa you’ll meet to pass it on to. Flashing your notsoflat tummy is slightly embarrassing.

You can prevent this by choosing your clothing very carefully.

4. Being prayed for may mean someone talks utter crap to you.

The fact is we’re all human, and sometimes what we think is God is actually us. Sooo…know that while prophecy can be personal it doesn’t have to  be private – it’s ok to share words you’ve been given by others with trusted Christian friends to help you discern them. And it’s ok to say ‘I’m sorry, but I don’t think that’s relevant for me right now, but thank you for having the courage to share that‘ to the person who has ‘spoken’.

It is not OK if that person continues to pray that over you once you’ve said that it is irrelevant.

5. Being prayed for can make people fall over.

So it’s important to have space in case that happens. And for people praying to have their eyes open so they can gently move someone out of the way of a falling person. Or catch a falling person.

6. Being prayed for can give you bruises.

If the people praying for someone else aren’t paying much attention and their pray-ee falls backwards and lands on your legs as you are already prostate on the ground seeing visions and filled with the Holy Spirit.

Again, it helps to have space and people praying with their eyes open.

7. Being prayed for can cause you injury.

Although I’m not sure how. But it did once happen to me in South Africa… (and to this day I don’t have a clue quite how it happened).

Make sure there is a First Aid kit handy, just in case.

8. And while we’re on the topic of injury…you may get someone pray for you and not check to see what’s happened after.

So if someone is praying for healing of the knee you injured during a prayer ministry time, they should really check you have actually been healed before they leave you abandoned and unable to get up off the floor should the Lord not have chosen to restore the tendons in your knee to working order.

9. Being prayed for makes you snotty.

Usually because of the welling up of tears and the fact that they end up running down your nose.

You can help by having tissues available and a nice prayer ministry team who subtley slip clean tissues into your hand so you can blow/wipe your nose and maintain a little dignity, and not gross out everyone around you by bogeys hanging out your nose or anything.

10. Being prayed for can change your life.

Because you open up yourself to listening to a powerful and almighty being. And you can never be too sure what He is going to say to you. Or the wonderful things He can do. The inspiration and encouragement and knowledge He can share with you.

So go enter in ready to listen with your mind and heart open, and prepare yourself to be blown away.

Like I said before…Praying is a dangerous business. Done with a bit of common sense and a lot of love it can change the world. But it’s a bit like what Forrest Gump’s mother said about life – it’s like a box of chocolates – you just ain’t ever sure what you’re gonna get! But like chocolate, if it’s from God…it’s probably pretty good!